Top Comments- 6/24/08 I Can Haz Comments? Edition

Hey! Here at Top Comments we strive to recognize and promote the talent of this community by highlighting outstanding comments found throughout the day by the diarist, and more importantly through nominations made at TopComments at gmail dot com by your fellow Kossacks. Include your username so we can credit you, and send 'em in by 9:45pm Eastern to ensure they make the final diary.

These nominations are subjective, and certainly not complete (as no one can read the complete site on a daily basis!). But we hope they will serve to shine a light where deserved, and to give the reader a good starting point in finding conversation on the site.

Please come in and make yourself at home...

I once used proper spelling and grammar. My high school English teacher Ms. Smith, whose voice I hear in my head when I write, would have been proud of me.  I neither split infinitives nor left a clause incomplete, and my spelling was impeccable. Then one day, it happened...

I discovered a dialect so compelling, so powerful, so downright fun that I could no longer help myself.  Let me show you, with a partial translation of the opening blockquote...

Oh hai! Her at Top Commentz we try 2 recognize an promote teh talent ov dis community by highlightin grate commentz finds throught teh dai by teh diarist, an more importantly thru nominashuns made at TopComments at gmail dot com by ur fellow kossackz. Include ur usernam so you can haz credit, an send em in by 9:45PM Eastern 2 mak sure they git in da final diary.

Yes, brillig is gone mad in ur DailyKos, manglin ur language. I knowz I iz late to teh party, but Iz tryin 2 mak up 4 lost tiem. tonite Im gonna try 2 share sum lolspeak basics an halp u speek it. Jus liek Kos-speek, thar r few common themez to lern. You 2 can haz lolspeek!

(Erm, if you'd like to just cut to the comments, feel free, we'll meet you there in a little while...)

Basic theme #1: "Im in ur noun, verb-ing ur related noun." For example, "Im in ur phone, violatin ur civl libertees."  Or "Im in ur Congress, dismantlin ur Constitushun."  This basic form is as important to lolspeak as "verb my fucking noun, Kos!" is to Kossacks. Git it rite, an teh whole siet knowz ur speekin gud lolcat.

Basic theme #2: "activity... ur doing it right/wrong." While this might sound like something only a concern troll might say, it's really more than that. For example, "Takin care ov peeps who need halp ... Dubya, ur doin it wrong!" Or, "Goin 2 Austin 2 hang wif ur netroots peeps... ur doin it right!"

Basic theme #3: "I can/cannot haz noun" This is the one that's crept most into my daily life. Enough so that Kid Brillig has picked it up, much to her incoming 5th grade teacher's dismay, I'm sure. Let's try a few phrases out: "I can haz halp wif TC if u send commentz 2 teh mailbox."   "I can not haz impeachment proceedingz on Dubya an it makez me mad." See, easy!!

OK, lastly, a few handy phrases and a couple of cool sites to occupy you when you need a break from weighty political discourse :-).

Ceiling Cat and Basement Cat: God and Satan, respectively
Nom Nom Nom: the sound you make while eating
Oh hai!: Hello
kthxbai: Goodbye

An lastly, sum kewl siets:

So ur marryin ur favrit kitteh? - dis siet will tell u how 2 do it

So ur a Bible readin kitteh? - u CAN HAZ!! Dis siet haz translated teh Book 4 u.

Do u WANT new program 4 dKos? Mebbe ct can haz teh LOLCODE 4 teh programming language.

I hopez ur feelin ready 2 speek LOLCAT on ur own. If u haz translashun queshuns, try dis siet. KTHXBAI!!

An now, on 2 Top Comments! Furst up, teh wunnerful contentz ov teh TC mailbox:

From Its the Supreme Court Stupid:

In response to a discussion about the comic strip Pogo, rkelley25 made the following observation.

From lcbo:

In BarbinMD's Your Abbreviated Pundit Round-Up, Clyde the Cat makes a pithy observation.

From A Siegel:

Fossil-fuel CEOs are analogous to theater owners.  Confused,  DelicateMonster has the explanation responding to  a post from me within Chapter1's Hansen on Warming: We have ONE year ... One Election. From within the same diary, Yet Another Liberal starts a culinary discussion.

And, I'm impressed by beatpanda's shoe size, are you? Mentioned in tip jar for beatpanda's well worth reading Save money, lose weight, and fight the climate crisis.

From sardonyx:

In BenGoshi's Read The Beatitudes Before You Vote, Ray Radlein has some not very beatific thoughts on coyote attacks.

pylonsound with A long thought from a winery employee.

Dallasdoc looks at Dobson's words and points out some fallacies.

From Light Emitting Pickle:

A hilarious rejoinder from ancblu.

hotdamn describes James Dobson's PhD thesis. Bwahahahaha!

From Jennifer Clare:

mistersite had one of the very best comments I have ever read at DailyKos today regarding why it is important that Democrats talk about faith with voters. I have never recommended a comment for "Top Comments" before, but this one, in my view, is really deserving. (Great first nomination, J! Keep em coming!)

From Elise:

Click "parent" to read what steve davis describes as a hot obligatory sex scene.

From Magnifico:

In her top comment, Proud Mom and Grandma wrote about what it means to parents and families that have loved ones fighting in the war and how little news coverage there really is from the war zones. (Go read the entire comment. Really. Just do it.)

From noweasels:

va dare speaks from the heart for all of our military families in greenies' beautiful diary In Memory of Dustin.

Now her iz suppozd 2 be my picks. I made a list, but I eated it (actually, got talking Netroots Nation in SL with someone and lost track of time. My bad). So we can not haz brillig picks. Sry. We move to teh Top Mojo, every kitteh's favrit part ov teh diary!!

Top 31 (including ties) excluding search-identifiable (or hand-weeded :-)) tip jars, first comments, and C&J:

  1) It can't just be levees by synchronicityii — 285
  2) Tax-exempt, eh? by BenGoshi — 158
  3) Absolutely. Front Page Must Support Russ. by FishOutofWater — 138
  4) Apologies accepted ... but ... by A Siegel — 137
  5) It's enough by ksh01 — 126
  6) My hand is not up by elveta — 116
  7) aside from 20-20 hindsight and better prep by Timroff — 108
  8) Fuck James Dobson. by Savage — 92
  9) Time to take back Christianity by skywaker9 — 86
10) my hand is up - well, one finger is. by nailbender — 86
11) You And I Could Talk To Days Or Weeks by webranding — 83
12) 4@4 by Magnifico — 83
13) Wow - Rec List...Thanks everyone! by cardboard — 73
14) So sorry, webranding by Youffraita — 73
15) This guy knew: by PBen — 73
16) Jindal's stripes are not changing. by gildareed — 70
17) Let's not forget by Sundiata — 69
18) This is not a repeat diary by Jerome a Paris — 65
19) Hey, the "ad" is proper diary pimpage... by highacidity — 65
20) Did you hear that someone's suing the AP? by Phoenix Woman — 63
21) Yell, Scream, Yell Scream by webranding — 60
22) Not just Sen. Obama, by Schopenhauer Telescope — 59
23) In Cedar Rapids by Oke — 57
24) There was no prep for this type of flood by Oke — 57
25) The only true bipartisanship in Washington by rick — 57
26) Yes, I agree. by Troutfishing — 56
27) TRUE RELIGION IS THIS: by rosabw — 55
28) this is great! The religious left has by juslikagrzly — 55
29) We don't have the votes. by occams hatchet — 53
30) I don't mean to diminish the tragedy at all by synchronicityii — 53
31) Feingold was the only Senator to vote against by Angry Mouse — 53

Top 31 (ties included) with no exclusions:

  1) That Is All I Got ........... by webranding — 768
  2) Blackout by Magnifico — 438
  3) p.s. by kos — 387
  4) Tips - sorry I'm always late on the Tip Jars by cardboard — 378
  5) Tip Jar by chapter1 — 375
  6) Tip Jar! by The Baptist Death Ray — 362
  7) Do you care ? I hope I care enough... by Troutfishing — 360
  8) It can't just be levees by synchronicityii — 285
  9) Hurray! by scorpiorising — 270
10) Tips for a Blue Bayou by Crashing Vor — 255
11) I did post it over to by Spud1 — 246
12) Real change by wmtriallawyer — 236
13) tips? comments? by Charlie Brown for Congress — 212
14) thank you for taking the time to read by teacherken — 182
15) Tax-exempt, eh? by BenGoshi — 158
16) Rather long diary. If you make it through... by BenGoshi — 155
17) Thanks Again! nt by Bob Lord — 150
18) Yep by DWG — 149
19) Absolutely. Front Page Must Support Russ. by FishOutofWater — 138
20) Apologies accepted ... but ... by A Siegel — 137
21) Tip Jar - June 24 by Jerome a Paris — 137
22) It's enough by ksh01 — 126
23) My hand is not up by elveta — 116
24) aside from 20-20 hindsight and better prep by Timroff — 108
25) Stop it. by droogie6655321 — 106
26) Fuck James Dobson. by Savage — 92
27) my hand is up - well, one finger is. by nailbender — 86
28) Time to take back Christianity by skywaker9 — 86
29) Tip jar by The Bulldog Manifesto — 85
30) You And I Could Talk To Days Or Weeks by webranding — 83
31) 4@4 by Magnifico — 83

Tiem 2 go play in teh commentz!! KTHXBAI!!!